Death
“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you will live forever.”
Mahatma Gandhi
Somebody died today. And they took with them the love, the pain, the knowledge, the struggles, the talents, and the victories of their daily life over a period of years.
They left behind loved ones and family members who are now grieving. They took with them a wealth of knowledge and a bridge to not only their family’s past, but our collective past.
They took with them the realities and the history of the times they lived through. They took with them knowledge of the world’s greatness, faults, loves, hates, priorities, and culture, whether right or wrong, that spanned the time of their life. They took with them the perspective that could guide our current times and culture if we are willing to listen and learn rather than judge.
An anonymous quote applies to this, “With the death of an elder, an entire encyclopedia goes with him.” When someone dies, all of their experiences and knowledge go with them unless they have passed it along through their stories, or writings.
Everyone lives through happy times and difficult times, and everyone lives through these times via the lens of their personal perspective, their biases, the biases of others towards them, and the influence of other people, experiences, and other cultures. It is important that we hear their stories, store their knowledge and take advantage of their wisdom.
We don’t have all the answers today, just like we didn’t have all the answers yesterday, or last month, or ten years ago. We do our best, at least I hope we do, to improve our lives and the lives of others. We can never get things perfect, but we can always strive to be better. We must give each other grace in that process.
But we can only be better if we are willing to have an open mind, listen to others, and try to meet them on equal terms as Children of God, not as members of a political party, a religion, or a particular tribe.
The Stoics have a saying “Momento Mori” which means “remember, death is inevitable.” The only thing certain is death and taxes.
There are some things worth dying for. In The Bible, John 15:13 says, “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” What are the things that are worth dying for to you? For me, the list is as follows:
My God
My kids
My family
My freedom
My country
I would probably also add a scenario of finding a cure for a fatal disease. God forbid you are ever put in this position, but let’s say you’re inflicted with something and the only option that you have available in order to extend your life is to take an experimental drug, or have an experimental procedure done to you. Wouldn’t you take that chance? Wouldn’t you want to know that the test on you may have saved other’s lives?
Many in the military would say that they would give their life for the person in the fox hole next to them…and many have.
My faith tells me that death is the end of a physical life and the beginning of an afterlife that I cannot comprehend, but that is “paradise.” My faith tells me that death is an event that allows our souls to cross over into this next life. It gives me hope, and hope matters.
CEMETERIES
I have visited cemeteries where family members are buried, or where historical figures are buried, or ones that are tied to famous battlefields like the American cemetery in Normandy, France. The site of the D-Day landings. If you ever get the chance to get there, I encourage you to go. Go and see the rows upon rows of crosses and headstones at the top of a cliff overlooking the English Channel. Go to see the distance these brave soldiers had to travel to get off the beach and up the hill. How exposed they were to the German armaments on top of the cliff. How far they had to run, and how hellish it must have been.
Regardless of the cemetery I visit, I pay my respects and reflect on the contributions made by the people buried there and how they impacted my life, whether directly in the case of family members and friends, or indirectly in case of historical figures or fallen soldiers. I focus on the numbers in the birthdates and the death dates to see if there are any numerical patterns, or dates that tie into other things. I focus on the dash in between the dates, finding it ironic that an entire lifetime is represented by a simple dash (-).
FUNERALS AND MEMORIALS
I also find it interesting that we tend to wait until someone is deceased before we discuss how much they meant to us. I saw the following quote from an unknown source that says, “Everything we say at funerals should be said at birthdays instead.” I wholeheartedly agree! We may embarrass the heck out of the person, but they should know the positive things we think about them while they are still with us. We should repeat these same things when they cross over as well, but then it will be an encore performance of things we have already said.
Whenever I attend a funeral or a memorial service, I try to talk about the best qualities of the person who has crossed over. I’ll talk about my fondest memories, and funniest moments with that person. I try to get people to laugh, and I try to get them to cry because that is how we honor those who are important to us, with laughter, tears, and hopefully tears of laughter.
Yes, somebody died today. They started their day not knowing of their fate. They had plans, expectations, joy, and fears. And they took all of that with them, but they couldn’t take any of their material assets, money, real estate, or any physical gifts that you gave them. It is common knowledge that you can’t take those things with you. But I believe you can take some things with you to the other side. You can take the love and positive memories that have touched your soul. Make sure to let people know how important they are to you in this lifetime, so they have that to take with them.
Somebody was also born today. And there are family members who are ecstatically happy at their arrival. What love, knowledge, talents, and victories will be experienced by them to maximize their lives and happiness, and minimize their pain and struggles? This new life brings new hope! What will they do to improve our world? What good things will everyone say about them? Let’s agree to teach all newborns around the world, regardless of race, creed or culture to LOVE, not to hate…and let’s see what happens!
QUOTES:
“Some people die at 25 and aren’t buried until 75.”
Benjamin Franklin
“People living deeply have no fear of death.”
Anais Nin
“You are going to die.
But death has not touched you yet.
So how will you live, while you still draw breath?
Will you love?
Will you feel?
Will you be silly?
Will you forgive?
Will you do your (expletive) best?
Or will you just complain about why you can’t?
Your choice.”
@aubreymarcus; @createthelove
“Death takes the body.
God takes the soul.
Our mind holds the memories.
Our hearts keep the love.
Our faith lets us know we will meet again.”
Kelly’s Treehouse
“Death ends a life, not a relationship.”
Mitch Albom, “Tuesdays with Morrie”
“Never. We never lose our loved ones. They accompany us; they don’t disappear from our lives. We are merely in different rooms.”
Paulo Coelho (Author and Lyricist)
Tom-ism: “After we have a moment of silence to honor the dead, we should continue to honor them with moments of laughter, smiles, conversations about them, and tears to honor all they meant to us.”
Look Up! Live a little!
Look Around! Who are the important people in your life that you need to spend more time with and tell them how important they are to you?
Look Ahead! Life is short! How can we maximize the time we have left?
Keep Going! Add more length and depth to that dash!